The lens of the Adoptee

What lens do you look through?

What I mean is what is the way in which you view the world.

-Like, glass half full, or half empty

-Like, safe, or unsafe

-Like, abundant, or lacking

-And like, negative or positive

I feel the universe is trying to get our attention. Mine especially, and I am sharing it here. What is your predominant thought process? Like what do you give a lot of your mental energy too.

These are some energies we give our attention-




And the list goes on. These energies above are some of the energies we are wrestling with these days. We are wrestling to become strong in the opposite energies. For when these energies are done with us, we will evolved to a new way of being. To become sick of Anger, is to finally accept Joy.

To be so sick of resentment, is to open the door to forgiveness.

Our world is evolving to a place were we no longer allow our minds to roam where ever they like. Why? Because we are in the age of accountability. An age when the balances must be brought to our mental activities. Many fear that there mental activities will be exposed, but the truth is they are never hidden from your site at all. A projection of your mental world is right in front of you.

For instance if you wish for someone to be gone, you will experience that person to be gone, and the energy that is with them. But is sending that person away the way to change it? Or should we work higher? And work to accept the energies that are in our life as teachers and ASK the Divine to show us what we need to know to truly proceed.

We all have what the church speaks of as free will. Which means we get to choose what energies we want. Many work with negative energies, and I have come to an understanding why. We came to transmute it. We came to feel them and to gain understanding, understanding that will be passed to generations and in all directions of time.

Each of us has a job here. Many desire here to be free of lack and limitation. But to be rid of it, we must feel the negative feelings and release them. Our world is full of pain these days. But what God/Divine is showing me is that we are being squeezed to release these energies that have been passed to us by our ancestors, and when we release these and stop holding onto them as truth, we transmute it. We are released as we forge to release our own negative thoughts that dominate our psyche. If there is a way, there is an opposite way. So turn around and begin to go another way. God will guide you.

Adoptees have experience pain. Most of it from what the world said about it, about our mothers and their loving acts that where at a time when the information we have garnered from this experience was not available. Our mothers had to trust that the decision they made was enough. And as an adoptee who has processed through this energy, I am free.

We all must face our dark thoughts about it. We must face what the world said, when we chose to believe. Our Mothers did not desire to hurt us. They did what was shown to them at the time. We have experienced what that has done. And as we become awake to the truth. Which is for me that God makes us all. Our Mothers and Fathers are vessels to make us, but the bottom line is, God makes us all.

So today I encourage you to look at the lenses you look through. If pain is a companion, look at it. Face it. Face how you feel about it. Face the thoughts you have that your Mother did not love you. For I know, today, that that is just not true. Our Mothers loved us. And as you read this blog and see the pain I had about it. You now can see that that pain pushed me to the truth. Love.

The energies above heard us to the opposite energy, if we are willing to see that we need to let it go. Like an angel of darkness that we wrestle with, Let go and the opposite will appear, but only if we let go.

Lord, I pray that each person here will devour this knowledge and may the Divine show each the way out of any pain in which they hold.

The truth is, you are enough, your mother was enough. And you were destined to be adopted. And so God is your Mother and Father. We have been set aside to transmute our parents and our worlds view of birth and creation. For we are as loved as anyone else.

WE have a choice. And we can let go of energies that no longer serve us. And then our hands will be open for the opposite. You can do this. I did.

Christmas Hope for Adoptees

Being Adopted is one of the most difficult things to understand and gain some solid ground. Being adopted has made me hold onto my Savior. Even when my path is to hell itself and the pain of this world. I walk each day trying to be what God wants. And I affect those around me, showing them my vulnerability. My life has shown me many things. Learning to be present is a work in progress. Security is a thing that eludes me many days I feel very unsettled. On those days I hear my higher self say to me, “Now you know how I feel”. On those days I realize that I walk the path of Christ. His birth was not from a marriage, and union that was blessed by the church and the world.

Christ’s birth proves that God makes the children, and the union has nothing to do with the church. What I see is that it has everything to do with God and Mother Earth. Each time a child is created, God and mother earth have come together in love. We think it this or that. But in the end the proof is that God and Mother Earth dance inside a woman womb and decide to come together to create life or not.

We think we have control of it, but in the end we are beholding to the creator. And our judgements about creation have in my opinion have grieved our Savior, who’s blood was shed to tell us this: I GOT THIS! ALL IS COVERED. If we believed this, would we abort? Would we adopt? Would we abuse? would we attach shame to a child or the creation of a child. I do say that I have it all worked out. But these things come to my mind and I wanted to share them here. We all have a purpose. Mine as I can see is that God uses me to change the way people look at this world.

I came into this world in a less than optimal way. I was adopted. And maybe that was not what God wanted to start with, but God always makes a way for a child he creates. And to him I owe my very life. For he has Never left me. My Mother may have. My Dad didn’t even know I was. But Christ has been with me since the day I was born, Mother Earth has been my comforter in nature. Both for me are my Savior.

This holiday Season adoptees, Birth Mothers, remember that the Divine, Christ, Buddha, whatever you call your Higher Power, God is with us all. This world does not make sense. But look at the bible, it says we are made in Gods image and his likeness, we have the same power. And we are far from being close to God in this way. But we can project a world even as God made this world, we contribute and co-create with the Divine. So, think about this. God cares for you, fuck everyone else. Pay attention to the creator of YOU! You matter. And I care. I allow myself to be used by the Divine to tell you that whatever you have judged about your self, God is big enough to carry you through.

The Divine never said it would be easy. But you can do this. I am lifting up every Adoptee and or Birth Mother who has struggled with their path. God is willing if we will ask for his help. He will walk through hell with you. If you are in hell right now, KNOW THAT THE DIVINE IS THERE WITH YOU!  The divine does not back off, not even an inch, it is us who walk away. WE think that life should be easy, that nothing will be required of us. But we came here in a body, with a soul and a mind. WE work with these three to grow in every way.

Anyone who needs prayer, please message me or post here. God cares. I am proof of that. Reach out. I can pray like no other. God has blessed me beyond compare. You are valid, you are precious,  you are amazing. xox


“Adoption searches—make no small plans, they have no magic to stir your blood”

We as adoptee MUST follow our hearts in these matters to gain equilibrium. This mothers refusal is as ignorant as this world has made her. Ignorant of herself and of the child she carried. I desire for Mothers to stop identifying with the act that made the child. And start seeing the gift of what a relinquished child is to God.

Adoption Detective | A True Story by Judith Land

Judith Land | Adoption Detective Nothing great has ever been achieved by making small plans. Small plans have no magic to stir your blood. Aiming high in hope and work is the more exciting and noble course that rouses passions in our heart and emboldens us to follow our dreams.

I happily pursued the identity of my biological mother because I had naïvely expected her to be gracious and forgiving and spontaneously welcome me to her bosom unconditionally, but my vision of a happy serendipitous reunion collapsed in a veil-of-tears. She coldheartedly rejected my pleas for clemency and mercy. She pleaded with me to keep my identity secret from her friends and family and threatened to sue me if I contacted her again. I felt like a wilted flower but I steadfastly refused to be dissuaded. I was unrepentant. Our disheartening conversation inspired me to think long and hard about my mission and all of…

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The Moon and our emotions

The Moon Woman

Moon is still waning in Scorpio so this is an ideal time to move some emotional energy in a creative way.
Whether you dance, sing, paint or drum doesn’t matter but while the moon is in this sign of emotional intensity it will only help you to discharge blocked or unexpressed emotion if you want to avoid an eruption or meltdown.
Signs you have unexpressed anger include:
– a tight jaw (clenching to avoid screaming)
– biting your tongue (for fear of what you’ll say if you’re honest)
– rashes & itchy skin (needing change)
– irritable bowel (digestive health is also a factor)
– swearing more than usual
– craving a drink
Signs you have unexpressed sadness include:
– spilling water
– avoiding feeling by overworking or being busy
– going to be late to avoid connecting with self
– using constant distractions like TV, movies or Facebook
– having excess mucus (unexpressed tears)
– feeling heavy & tired (the element of water weighs us down)
– not wanting to get out of bed & face the day
When we reconnect with ourselves by attuning to the unexpressed feelings within us & allowing them expression, we free ourselves from the need for unconscious behaviours which mask our feelings & keep us in a state of disassociation. This helps us to be more present with ourselves, those around us & the task at hand.
The tracks on my Chakra Workout double CD (also available as an MP3 download) are great for moving e-motion – ‘energy in motion’. So consider gifting yourself or someone you love with these 10-15 min active practices you can do in your lounge room to shift blocks & feel energised & radiant.
Here’s the link:…/good-morning-chakra-workout/
If you’d like to join me this week for a FREE global meditation on the eve of this week’s new moon in Sagittarius register via this link:
Blessings on your day,

Here is a way to express those feelings. You need not post it on here if you don’t feel the need. I am a teacher, so God has got me in the lime light to show people it can be done any old way. Just do it!

Come find me on Facebook

Being Called Crazy

During my time of truth purging, I was told I needed mental help. True. I was told I need professional help. True. But the help I needed was not another human to talk to about a subject that I had gotten NO understanding about, but a loving Creator who gets all of me. So I ventured out on my own. I asked God to heal me, and show me how so I could help others. I am not sure I am done, but I have gained some relief in my venture to the dark side and the truth about what the world says and what I felt.

I accept that being adopted made me feel like shit at times. Especially when folks would tell me to forget my Birth Mom. Especially when they told me my Birth Mother did not want me. Who wants to hear that their Mother did not want them. But that was the truth, and God showed me why? Because the woman who wanted me was my Mother. Now folks that is a game changer. And if adoptees could embrace this, it would change their relationships with their Adopted parents. How? Well, how do you feel when someone thinks bad things about you? Does it make you want to be with them? Does it make you want to hold them? But this is happening everyday in many adoptees lives. Now I am not saying that it is wrong, it just is. I can see why?

  1. No one talks about it.
  2. Adoptive parents are scared of being rejected or the child wanting the Birth Mother.
  3. Parents who adopted were not prepared properly
  4. The world says cruel things about Birth Mothers
  5. Adoptees believe that if they speak and ask questions that their parents that showed up will reject them too. (this one is big)
  6. The world says cruel things to adoptees
  7. We kind of hide from things we don’t understand
  8. Many of our belief are formed when we are very young, birth-10
  9. Many of us are running information that is not complete.
  10. Birth Mothers are not prepared.
  11. We have unrealistic expectations on both sides of what it should be like.

These are a few. I am sure there are more and I will post more. Feel free to help me with your perceptions. For it is all of our truths that set us free. And as we share our views, we make it clearer for folks to understand.


Sometimes you got to risk looking crazy to become sane. And what I have garnered speaking my crazy truth is an understanding. And I have stood up for myself, which is key to getting yourself onto higher solid ground.