Accepting someone who’s endured trauma takes guts. To do that, you have to accept your own traumas. And also accepting that due to that trauma and lack of anyway to heal it you inflicted that trauma onto those who tried to love you and who you tried to love.
Life makes no sense if you think everything’s cake like good old Marie A. Trials are a part of this life until we learn the lesson and ready ourselves for what’s ahead. Two plus two will add up to something. Will we understand our actions are adding up to something? And that the guy does speak and warn us.
My stomach has been speaking to me for years. But I’ve been told to be quiet while doctors cut at my perfect body telling me to go home. Sick to my stomach. Home sick. My life torn apart to make two woman happy that aren’t happy. Makes no sense to me. This is what they wanted. Neither of them considered me in the equation. Both expecting to get their own way. And me in there way.
I accept my wounding. Can you? Can you accept me as I am? And can we work on better, together. I’m just so over this separation of 360 degrees. I don’t wish to hurt anyone. We all seem hurt no matter what I do. I figured it was time for Pandora’s box to just open up and let it all out. So we all could move on.
I took the hit. We all did. And I took the hit again. One last time. Let’s end it. Let’s be rebellious. Like Jesus and do what adoption didn’t plan for, but I did. I planned and prayed for unity of two klans that I am now a part of. Is that just to hard?
The signs of trauma. All over my family. Them to blind to see it until me. Lord. Grant us grace and mercy. Help us begin again. And show the world how to do it. And end this madness and make the way where there was no way. Amen. Thank you.