We. Find a way. We build the way.

And god helps us. For God will make a way through us where there seems to be no way.

Do you think there’s more for you? In this life? Or is it the same old raisin brand each day?

How does anything happen? A spark. An idea. A feeling. Hunger pains lead to meals being made. That’s good is a manifestation caused by hunger. Fact. What am I hungry for?

You know I’ve been camped out in a garage for two years now. my protest she shack where folks come and protest their own Mama to me. And I listen and wonder do they see me? Who’s got two? Who don’t appear to be budging? Both of them matter to me. And I share my story with them. Seems they? Those that come for sympathy find way more then sympathy from me. They find empathy. I know the longing so well. For both moms together. Smells like a cake baking in an oven. Sounds like a bunch of people talking. Tastes like tea time fun time with Mamas.

What all this else is ain’t mine. I’m looking for two people to come together so we all can have tea. And it takes so long when you like me. To get folks over themselves enough to even see why and who brought us all together was me. The one asking for tea with her two Mama.

Mama may have spread her legs and let me come in. But I had to agree to stay. Maybe she got lost along the way? But I never lost her one day. I take them both with me everywhere I go.

And that’s the way I found when there was no way prepared for this journey. Hold on tightly. But loosely. As I grew up and saw Linda all around me. Even heard her in my own name despite her intentions. This cat was never in a bag at all. Mama just needed some reminding.

What price will I pay for love? This story is the tale of a girl who won’t give up on love. Come hail or high water. She’s gone postal. She delivers every time what you ordered.

What. Shall we order now that we are aware we are free too? What do we three want??the silence without my words flowing across a screen? Nothingness? Noing? No me? What did you two come together them for? All this fuss. Over a child. One thinks shes gone. And the other still sees her Mama in her plain as day. Like talking to me ain’t like talking to my Mama? With a twist of daddy. Thank you. This gin and tonic is ready to be served.

Why and what are folks waiting on? We could be celebrating such a great union of woman but no body’s even wrote me a letter? I said. I’m staying. Which means I’m not going away from anyone. This is what you get when you put this together. Get over it. There’s way better then this. But everyone’s got to get it to move on.

Or I just stay in the streets talking about it. Jesus stands at the door and knocks. How long does a person let him stand their knocking to get in? While the neighbors walk by and ask questions? Maybe they aren’t home? Jesus say, they are home. Are you sure it’s the right address Jesus? Jesus says, yes. It’s the right address. I know them all by heart. Maybe they don’t want to see you? And Jesus cringes at the idea of having to deal with that kind of madness, says, I rebuke that in the name of Jesus! No. That’s not it. They are sleepy.

And I promised to be a gentleman and knock when I wished to come in. And so I must keep knocking. I did do it to myself. I agree it looks silly. But my people need to know they do have the free will to not answer the door and be a dick and leave me outside while the whole world is laughing at us all. But. They are sheep. Who need knocking. And I am kind and don’t knock them in the brains. Yes. I’m cool.

But my arms are strong? All this knocking has made my arms strong. For hugging when folks finally open their doors and let me in. I can’t wait. Each day I go out knocking like Forrest Gump. Open your door and give it away. Your love. Seems so creepy a saying and yet not really if you possess a clean mind. Let’s make that distinction now. I ain’t like you. Your perceiving what you’re perceiving. And your perception of me is that, your perception of anything is yours. Not mine.

I’m trying to explain it so you can understand me. Having your Mama leave you is like leaving a big wide door for God to come into. And us you through the whole that caused the pain. God uses me to reach out to others to say. I am here. See me in her for a moment. Remember. Remember. God is real. God is all and all is god. Don’t get lost in the woods. That’s what my Mama did to me.

She may have Left me on the cutting room floor of the design studio, but honey, Chanel picked me up and made me a dress of all dresses. Classically trained hippie. And life with Mrs. Chanel #5 was wild for this hippie chick. And Mama should have all the nips and tucks shown to her by me of course. I am the dress extraordinar! I’ve got a pick of me that describes it all.

Here we go. What is this? Well. The top would not behave so it got put in a runner band of shame on top of my head looking like a fountain of shame. Front and center! Lovely! Just lovely fashion.

That hair? Mop whatever it was. People wondered why I was cutting my hair so young? Trying to save my hair from this woman!! Scalping me all day. Ugh. Looks like hat hair with a ponytail in the middle. Like a boy! Right. So dainty a thing. But that hair? Yep. You’re right. That hair.

I had to build a way here. My Mama sent me here against my will. Cuz I’d rather have stay with here. Truth be known and all. This is the crazy way I did it. How I had to adapt to the new situation after coming from you. She’s not really like you at all? Maybe a little. You both can be mean. Js. Js. Truth.

I am a trooper. Storm. I like it that way that’s how my Mama wants it. Cuz this is what this got her and if she does not like it she should sue Adoption law makers. If I am not what she was promised she should, could go to court about it. Or just accept it.

psychecafe

I am an Adapted, artist, Mother, a soul, a human, singer, writer, activist, minister and deprogrammer and reprogrammer of minds. And I am here because we need to change how you see it, a lot of things that is. For us Adoptees who have lived in the dark. We were cut off from our families. And that is sad people.

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