So much ancestral shit.

My fingers turned brown. All the ancestral shit around here. And folks be saying it little old me typing on a phone? Oh mirror work as I call them all out.

Projecting what I see into the wide screen of your mind. Storie writers who reright code. Whatever. History. Recounting history. Then showing the product. And working a new equation. Writing using words coded into messages. Little glitches for only the eyes that are able to spot them. Like an A in the middle of the zzzzz page. The A means something to a person who reads code all day everyday. Like reading the matrix. Wall Street journal.

Watching your kids work it out. Watching your family work it out. Observing. Listening to every word said or unsaid. Watching their moves and countermoves. All winners. Unless they swallowed a pill that lead them to believe otherwise. Not me. I know my family are all winners. What’s it say?

Proverbs. You look it up.

[8] Reprove not a scorner, lest he hate thee: rebuke a wise man, and he will love thee. … [10] The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom: and the knowledge of the holy is understanding. [11] For by me thy days shall be multiplied, and the years of thy life shall be increased.

Where is God? Within. Within. Says it right in black and white, and folks? Be Stuck in the grey about it?? Yes. It takes black and white to make gray. But don’t get lost in the gray areas. God is within me. Talks to me through writing. I learn about myself and others. What’s mine. What’s theirs. That’s? Is being able to deal in plurals. That is expanded mindset. Connected. Learning to decode life and navigate. The mental terrain.

Am I shifting to fast for you? 1-2-3-4 gears. Reverse it. 1-2-3-4 gears. Reverse it.

What’s it say? Know thyself. Know your body. Know your own shit. And know how to identify your shit in others and theirs. As we look in the mirror. I’ve dumped a lot of hair in my life time. Smelled it. Watched it go down a drain. Said goodbye and washed my hands honey. I know my shit and someone else. I sense them. Like smelling. Like an animal that I am. Fully aware I am an animal and not delusional like many I meet denying this very fact. I don’t have to talk about it h less someone else begins to talk about their shit and what’s in it.

And I will help sort. Sure. I’m a good person who deals with smelly issue that people who are micromanaging their shit have. I’ve been like that before. Like where is it? And I point out to the seemly list articles of whatever while they tell me it’s mine. 🤣🤣🤣🤣 I am living in a very low rent apartment with my Mama Jean. Helping folks sort their shit out. 🤣🤣🤣 and they want me to get a better place? That’s funny.

I had a better place and no one seemed to see it that way? I mean I did help build it? My sweat and inheritance went into it. And Mama Jean invested too? But no one seemed to see us? Looking at us like we were crazy? Animals. Providing a better. To unsatisfied customers. Turned our project together away. Walked away. Did not choose to invest? Well? Guess that was a win. Thank you next. Practice better place. Maybe next one. Or next one. When do folks get satisfied?

For me? When I throw it all to the wind and tell God thank you next. Knowing all I invested was seen by the one who sees all I’ve done. I know what you did? Means. God knows all the good and bad I did practicing to do better. no judgement. Grace. Forgiven. Placed under my blood. God within. Everything is Gods. My blood too. And yours. If you can even get what I am saying.

If you know you. And your own shit and how it smells? Like Carrots or broccoli or micro management. What it looks like. Sounds like. Smells like. Feels like. When your minding your own business and someone walks into your scared space? You smell it real strong. Hear it loudly. Become anxious. Stressed. When before you felt fine. All up in the Ego wrapped up with the feels. Taking a nap on life. Enjoying life.

And folks walking in with their bag of goodies talking about it. Sorting it out loud. Talking in class. And they dare to bow up to the teacher in her class just napping until the next student walks in? Who talking about equations out loud and interrupting the classroom. Ok. Ok. Yeah. I take to the air like a witch. And speak.

Be a Mother. I am a mother. Look it up. I do everything with little to no instructions. It’s instinct. Duh. Don’t tell me how to run my class. My Mamas are like this. We say this like this here. Say whatever out there. We do it like this here in my classroom. Do what you wish out there.

What? Are my children doing right now? Good question. What am I doing right now? Typing the morning type. Getting ready to go take Mama Jean what she has asked my daughter to bring. She did not text me. She text her. And she told me to do it. Okay😩 🤣🤣✔️ y’all crack me up with this pass the buck. throwing it all on the scapegoat Mama. 🤣 so I can throw it back to them. Try again honey. Harder next time. We can do this. They will learn. Xoxo

Linda? Still passing the buck to Nana who gives it to my daughter who gives it to me. When’s this gonna come together? She’s in the hospital. Where Chelsie? What? You don’t know? She’s what? Doing stuff? On her own is she? Oh. Excuse me for butting Into your party? my bad. So uninvited. Guess you don’t want anyone to come see your when she’s gone and there’s no one left to pass the buck? Cuz that’s what you are sowing sister. Do you even see that? Your sister friend covalent keeper is in the hospital. The one who took your child and raised her as her own knowing full well I came from you? Huh? So strange. So strange indeed.

And I’m upset about the state of the family? Such a silly girl? I just don’t get it do I? Your so tired helping strangers who have not earned your company and deny the one person who deserves all your company. While I hold down the fort for you. Wow! You. Have balls. I’ll give you that. Singular mindsets. In a plural world don’t work honey.

People try to pull me into their singular worlds all day. Eventually. I pull them into plural. Two way mirror. Think about that. Chew on that. The mirror talks.

psychecafe

I am an Adapted, artist, Mother, a soul, a human, singer, writer, activist, minister and deprogrammer and reprogrammer of minds. And I am here because we need to change how you see it, a lot of things that is. For us Adoptees who have lived in the dark. We were cut off from our families. And that is sad people.

Submit a comment

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.