Therapy. Takes work.

I can identify with much of what Katy’s been through.

Living adopted is like having a persona that must be projected, while still having me within. Finding paperwork with the name of my other me as a young adult totally blew my mind.

And dealing with trying to process my inner child out to allow her to shine beyond what adoptions rules deemed was acceptable for me to do and be was a job I had to do alone. No one could see the me I am inside. Did my children even see her? Surely? They did?

Integrating my selves naturally began when God gave me myself back. When I finally realized I could just tell the truth that Stephanie experiences as Belinda Jean.

And Adoption made me more different than my Mama could even imagine.

And I’ve carved myself to freedom using the truth. I want a better relationship than what I have with my Mamas, always. They saw their side but did not see mine. My family saw their side and not mine.

And I feel my family thought they knew and were completely mislead to believe that the information they we given was true until I spoke up. I see that. It doesn’t mean I need to back off and feel sorry for that. It’s not about pity. Pity empowers no one. Knowledge empowers. And they needed to know my side so that they could choose again. New info. New choices.

And a new direction for us all. Yes. We all need to process out the old way we saw it. Yes. I need my family to express themselves to me so that we can all process this anger out that we carry for Mama, who can’t seem to feel it unless I’m around.

I’ve noticed that from the get go. So Mama and me share that emotion.

And our biggest enemy has been between us all playing us like fools. Adoption. I end all tales with my life experiences.

The work of facing this is key in processing this for the whole family. We can’t leave it like this because it says a lot about us, not just me. Once it’s public we all are obliged to do something about it.

I want to leave a lasting scare on Adoption to make people remember me and my story when they even consider giving a baby produced naturally without a license to prove permission granted to conceive away.

I want people to consider being less judgmental and more supportive of the Mama to be and her offspring. There’s a reason why and it’s for the Mama to find out while raising their child what that is.

No one should put us asunder. Because God put us together. Yet Adoptions breaking that rule each time we the children get diverted. Evolution takes longer when we mess with Gods design and our free wills are costing us all the future.

Besides.

Where’s my free will when my Mamas through adoption red tapes,

Hold me captive to an idea?

My free will was taken and I have recovered it.

I’m gonna use this precious thing to set us all free instead of just myself like Mama. My mask? Was your mask in my way.

Stephanie allowed you to change her name. But she’s still alive inside of me. My Daddy named his next girl after me and God made a mark. Daddy knew. He’d been waiting for me to call.

And I won’t let Daddy down.

psychecafe

I am an Adapted, artist, Mother, a soul, a human, singer, writer, activist, minister and deprogrammer and reprogrammer of minds. And I am here because we need to change how you see it, a lot of things that is. For us Adoptees who have lived in the dark. We were cut off from our families. And that is sad people.

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