She’s not a substance. Although you can drink her in. Or an activity, but she can move you. Get it right guys. Stop telling me I am obsessive, and that my Mama is obsessive! She cleans because at least she can control that. I’m that way too. Drawers closets. All that.
Some people just want to do their best. So they do.
I know people that don’t do that kind of cleaning. They called me obsessive.
And I’ve been told I’m obsessing about my mother. Fuck you. You have you’re and don’t even give a fuck about her? Lazy bastard that have no idea I am them if they lost their Mama? WTH? Does make me upset. No gratitude for their own Mama? Telling me I’m I waive because I love mine to death and didn’t even know her? Disloyal. Like wow.
Then I come home to find my own sisters hoarding my own Mama from me? Don’t say I didn’t come forward? I did. Permission to board was denied. And you all signed off on that one. So own that. You shouldn’t give a shit what I act like. And I’ve told you what’s strange about you? I had to guess what ya thought about me by your lack of actions? Own that. Dropped the ball and would not even play. Most people pick up a ball in play and get it going? Not you all?
Happy Mothers Day Mama.
Your three daughters have saved you from your own daughter!! All is well in the kingdom.
Why can’t I believe that Mama? Why?
Who’s ruling you Mama? Why would god order a separation? What has happened that you feel is so bad that God can not repair? That’s what I wonder? I text you. And leave many messages.
Where is Mama? Checked out I guess? Yoo-hoo!! Mama? Anyone home? That’s how it feels these days? And that’s concerning. I’m documenting it here to show that I am working as best I can to communicate to a family very fragile and wounded. That they feel I am a threat to their well being? Not realizing their well being was already threatened. Thank God I came along to change that. Like a mental electrician of sorts.
Emotional disconnection syndrome. Linked in the brain. Fried circuits passed down through dna. Coping behaviors. Learned behaviors. Being changed and healed. Rewires. With well said words. Using them like a mental knife to heal my Mamas mind about a lot of things.
She’s been quite overwhelmed. And unable to speak about what’s going on. But I know the signs. She’s not crazy. She’s healing.
I’m supporting her through this integration process. So she doesn’t blow a gasket! Which is a kind as I can be since I know and trust god completely. And am assuring her as we go. It is a rough ride. But well worth it. Xoxo
(of a substance or activity) causing or likely to cause someone to become addicted.
“a highly addictive drug”
synonyms: habit-forming, causing addiction, causing dependency; More
relating to or susceptible to being or becoming addicted to something.“addictive behavior”