Healing comes.

How does healing come? Is it like a feather? Is it all light a fluffy?

Well? To look at surgery? It’s come with a price and a knife. And a keen eye that’s walked the road of healing themselves. How can any untrained surgeon guide any body to healing without skill? And a gift. Which would mean? I’ve done my own surgery? Yep. Your right.

I had to climb out of my own hole to be able to guide another out of theirs? Yep. Your right. I got out of my whole the day the light switch went on for me and I realized. I wasn’t adopted at all. It’s was a formality. The day the full force of the fact that I did and never had bought the lie. I always knew who I was from and proudly spoke her name each time I spoke my own.

Healing comes when you realize. For me at least. That I was always Linda Marie’s daughter raised my another woman. Named after her and my Mama? And that they both mattered to me a whole lot. Despite all their seeming short comings about know what’s up with me their daughter? People have failed to see my side for to long. Because I’ve got a perfect view of two woman trying so hard to play by the rules? And having to go without what really matters. Love. From me to them and from them to each other.

How could either of them see each other for me in the way? Hell. That’s hell to not see the woman who’s standing in for ya. And hell is to jot realize another woman’s sacrifice so that she could have? And yes. It’s twisted. Society started this twisted game? Using ya kids to tie it all together in some god awful bow from hell when we all are connected.

Like what’s the point? A child is a mediator?a child is an ambassador for keeping what peace? Needed to be kept on the day of my birth? Voices of ideas that babies are shame? And need to be hidden? Moses had to hide his light while unaware Egyptians rules over his people while he watched them be beaten for no damn good reason? What is Adoptions reason?

  • Cuz I’m Moses now.
  • And my snake is the tongue I have to god to strike this sick idea down.
  • Sure folks don’t see it right now
  • Cuz they just think I am a woman wining about her Mama.
  • But I am just one child who’s whined for her Mama.
  • Many are dead who whines to god for their Mamas.
  • God never forgets tears.
  • God saves them.
  • For what?
  • Washing.
  • The flood
  • Case in point.
  • Tsunamis. Case in point.
  • Tears evaporate.
  • Where do they go?
  • The air
  • To form clouds.
  • Must society demand another washing?
  • Cuz that’s not gonna wash it right.
  • Those who remain still have active dna of ignorance if we don’t get this one.
  • All must be updated about this.
  • God is science.
  • It’s about mentality
  • What kept the Israelites bound?
  • They left? Didn’t they?
  • What kept them so long letting the Egyptians brutalize them?
  • Talk about a story rewrite on fleek?
  • Parting the sea?
  • What does the imagery say?
  • Well? No. For one.
  • Moses said no more like this.
  • And he basically proved to his people they could walk away.
  • And that the universe wanted them to walk away from this bad relationship?
  • Way of relating?
  • It’s was all a mindset.
  • Egyptians rule
  • Israelites inslaved
  • But it really never had to be like that at all.
  • Yeah. It’s deep.
  • Way deeper than any preachers ever preached to me?
  • See? It’s a pattern of behavior that got started and we keep trying to walk away from in each story?
  • And it’s in the stories we don’t let go of that don’t work that’s the issue?
  • Yes. It’s is this way out. The solution is way out of our behavioral comfort zone.
  • It’s called change.
  • No sea needed if we see.
  • All of it was in the minds of the times
  • Everyone needed some god that would save them.
  • Who would war for them and free them
  • Just like this Moses does for her Mama now.
  • Bound by a mindset of slavery to an old idea that sucked.
  • Why did Moses have to go without?
  • Just to save a bunch of complainers?
  • Wanders?
  • What was the point of the story?
  • Why did they wander
  • Why do we wander?
  • Lack of the ability to update our story lines?
  • For lack of faith?
  • In our own abilities to change it ourselves.
  • Like I am doing right here right now.
  • A detox is only a dumping of an old story anyway. Old energies must be purged from our systems.
  • The stories of old tell the radical ways we change?
  • Talk about drama central?
  • When it’s was how far to the promised land?
  • Walking distance
  • But they wandered?
  • Why?
  • Stuck in a mindset loop?
  • About what?
  • Living as a slave if you can believe that?
  • Most people glaze over that fact?
  • Oh God why do I wander?
  • Cuz your full of yesterdays shit
  • That’s why!
  • And yes. I’ve been full of shit each day I wake and go poop.
  • And we also need to poop old mindsets, like yesterday’s groceries we sucked the life out of the night before?
  • And my Mama was full of some of yesterday’s shit she had not processed to even make a poop about this?
  • Sad to be emotionally constipated for so long?
  • That old story made her sick.
  • A lie made the surrealities sick too
  • That’s why they needed manna.
  • Jesus said, Man shall not live on bread alone, but from every word that proceeds out of the mouth of God.
  • Are we made in the image and likeness of God or aren’t we?
  • Is God’s spirit within us or not?
  • Are these bodies organic machines or not?
  • Are the firmed with dirt and water and bacteria or not?
  • If God is within. Like scripture dictates?
  • Then the only part of us that’s struggling is the organic mechanism.
  • And that’s easy when we wander
  • We hallucinate so God can take charge of the body
  • Like when Jesus wandered and let God take over.
  • Like us all when we realize this story goes on and on and we can change it without a flood.
  • We can change it in our mind
  • Just like I’ve changed it in my Mamas mind forever in time.
  • And if one Mama gets healed?
  • Every Mama gets healed.
  • Fact.
  • Adoption is slavery in reverse.
  • Do we think Moses didn’t want to go home?
  • Could he go home?
  • No. Not unless everyone went home.
  • And in the end?
  • Did anyone make sure he got there?
  • No.
  • We have much to learn.
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