I miss you Mama.

I miss you Mama

All damn year

But this year

I miss you most

I apologize for being such a disappointment.

And I am trying to do better

See? I finally realized

That I was always yours

And that no matter what who and where

You were always my lighthouse and my leader

And I am disappointed too.

That’s we all got scammed back in 63

And that no matter

How hard I tried

And I tried.

I could not

My body would not

Let me ever

Forget you

Feelings come and feelings can go

When you finally come clean

And tell

Your Mama the truth

So hopefully she can see

How much

She really means to me

I may now seem like some freak

That crawled

Out of the woodwork

My prayer is in time

You’ll see

God’s work in me

And a miracle for all to see and appreciate what Gods sending to them

Cuz he’s gonna keep sending them

Until we receive the gifts that are within this daughter

Crying so loud it upsets me

Makes me shake and unearth it all

That love is been saving for just this right moment

Like wine I am pouring

Into your cup, so adoring you

This daughters heart is sore for you.

And this Christmas most

I wanted to be your special guest of Honor

And to sit by your fire

And love on your proper

Just like every ole daughter should love on her own Mother.

This doesn’t take anything away from my other

Mother who’s love has its own cup for drawing

But the cup is always filled to overflowing

With love from my love for just knowing

Who my Mama is within me.

It’s no sin

Can’t ya see?

I hit the mark God showed me

How to light a fire under an ass who’s not seeing

All the blessings that are coming

All that God’s unearthing

To build a better house for loving

Than a house so empty and void still pretending

It’s ok for us to even be this way

It’s offending

To God who is mending

Our hearts back together

With thread from the heavens

Stitching stitching unending

For the ties of a mother

They bind

And it’s just a silly tear from some devil

Who tried to cut what God knows is able

To heal.

I love you

I miss you

This Christmas most.



I am an Adapted, artist, Mother, a soul, a human, singer, writer, activist, minister and deprogrammer and reprogrammer of minds. And I am here because we need to change how you see it, a lot of things that is. For us Adoptees who have lived in the dark. We were cut off from our families. And that is sad people.

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