Commitment.

Always and forever. It’s never ever been any other way. Approaching my Mama about committing back to me is the deal. And helping her to see that she always was that way. And that life just rolled on and on without me visible in her life and yet always within her heart and always on her mind. At the sink. Or while cleaning. Driving. Working in the garden I was on her mind.

When I turned 18. And she thought about me being 18 and an adult. I. Got the message and felt her very strongly around me that day. It was like her thoughts about me traveled some kind of lightening rail to me. It was profound. I had never actually felt her thoughts? It’s was like god letting me listen in consciously. Like some kind of divine party line?

And that is what I am saying to everyone. Our connections are strong to our DNA and especially to our mothers. We all say the saying, “if Mama ain’t happy?, ain’t no body happy.” Over and over folks say that saying. Do we really take the time to let that sink in? I do? I allow God to allow my Mamas energies to pierce my consciousness. Yes.

When Mama needs help. I am available for help. Prayer is a mighty powerful tool coupled with truth. And I know the power of a tightly spoken prayer for her highest good. Yes. She’s always had me in her prayer warrior club. I’m just? Quiet till now?

And when God hits me. Through my own daughter? When she up and leaves me? And I really began to see? That’s all the shit inside of me was getting in our way? That the old stories we lived needed to have a closing, Big Bang ending? I listened to God who has guided us both through this valley of our souls together in this. Yeah. Deep shit here. Sometimes to deep for folks to stomach. But my Mamas stomachs hurt for years from swallowing the bullshit.

She just didn’t realize. Until now. How much she swallowed? And for a woman like my Mama. Who strives to be her best. To realize how off what she was told is? And to realize she knew it in her spirit all along and to be finally validated by her own daughter who’s saying ouch! That’s she had an ouch too. And she’s was never alone in this.

She had me as her secret prayer warrior all along. And that I sang song back to her soul to wash her clean. As a child? Just knowing. God would help her through her own struggles with this arrangement. And that I prove. God hears every prayer and let me listen in so that I could one day. Tell her.

I heard the call Mama. I’ve come home to help.

That’s God. That’s a miracle. That’s a divine connection no man can put asunder. And why would a man try? Why? Because Adoption tried. And lost. You can move me around the board. But I’ll still win with a check mate. Mama is my home. So there. Put that in your book Adoption!! I found home. And God helped me. Good try. Trying to tear us apart.

It didn’t work. You can move a child. But they know instinctually how to get back home. I am living proof. So your math is all off. It’s time to rethink this supposed option.

That’s for leaving Mama in the dark. Thanks for giving me this win. As I shine the light on something she’s secretly struggled with for years! Right under my families Noses!! Deep sorrows. Deep longings. Mothers always feel the pain of separation. My last post was the post of a Mother longing for her daughter at Christmas? Does my Family see that Mamas been so strong?

That’s it’s now time for us to step you and help her be who she really is. And to embrace this change so she can walk with her head held high knowing full well! Her prayers were heard. And God sent me to give her the messages. The feedback? My sisters?

Are now being lazy. Greedy. Hormongeqrs. And all the scriptures Mama gave me on the phone. Warning me what she was up against. To pray. For all of your asses. Not mine. To light you all up so she could really see that what’s she was feeling was right within her own family? You all just gonna lay around and suck off this woman all day? I never did get to suck off her? So I would know about that sweetie? Sucking not my thing?

  1. You all have been telling on yourselves. I made you. God through me made you barf your own shit up. Clean it up. It’s not Mamas job. She’s busy cleaning with me and does not need your bullshit. Anymore.
  2. Go complain to yourself in the mirror. For not seeing this one coming?

This is good for Mama. No matter what you think. And you will not be able to stop our union and recommitment to each other.

So wake up. Get up. And get ready to celebrate? Or get ready to not be invited? You decide?

Mama wants us all on board? Wtf? Wake up? Like dudes? She’s let me in three times? And Vicky comes over three times? Sharing the local energies with me? Jealously. Worry.

Galatians 5:19-21 New International Version (NIV)

19 The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality,<sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-29182A" data-link="(A)” style=”font-size: 0.625em; line-height: 22px; vertical-align: top”> impurity and debauchery; 20 idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions 21 and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like.<sup class="crossreference" data-cr="#cen-NIV-29184B" data-link="(B)” style=”font-size: 0.625em; line-height: 22px; vertical-align: top”> I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.

Hello? Sexually immoral is to lie about sex. Idolatry is to not listen to the voice of god and follow an old way. Witchcraft is a ill intended prayer with selfish motives. Not for the highest good of ALL involved. Discord. Need I say more?

You all better get clean. I’m clean as a whistle blower. My shakes gone. I wrote it all out here as my confession before Mama and the world bitches!

Recognize. Dissensions? You reek! Clean up your souls and those minds of yours. And stop clouding Mamas view with your own shit. She loves you. And I love you all enough to say grow up. I have.

What Mama? Let alone ours. Would want ya like this? Answer that? And bingo. You have the answer.

But here’s a hint. No Mama wants that shit in her house!!

The commitment issues on you all. Not on us. Me and Mama are on fleek. Tight. She’s seeing how tight now. Oh yeah she is. How committed this little girl is to her Mamas highest good.

The highest good would you all getting it straight. And straightening it up. Cuz I’m straight like an arrow. To the heart of this matter. Which is her heart. Not yours. Not your petty whatever’s . Shut up and clean up.

Unless you want me to keep going? I can. I came to win. I’ve won already. It’s just you that can’t seem to see. Look.

With or without you all? This change is happening. You can bury your head in some sand? But we all know what scripture says about that don’t we? Read. Learn. Grow. You can keep feeling insecure and calling folks un-welcome in your own Mamas home in front of your sister and nephew, looking like an ass? Because as far as I can see? That’s up to her to say? Not you Victoria? Your just acting a little yo big for those britches girl. You ain’t no man of Mamas house.

Only the last one. Don’t even think you can fit those pants honey child? Not even. Not even is own daughter can fill them. No one will ever fill them. And your abusive girl. Bossing Mama around? Slamming doors on her baby girl? Oh. You don’t even see do you? But I do.

Mama see now what your all made of. Yourselves. I’m made of her. Just raised by another. Which is pretty wicked. And hella powerful. An observer close enough to shed light. Pretty damn good Mama. I’d say?

What a come back. Oh. They thought they knew it all? Ha! Your all just beginning to learn about me and our Mama. A good Mama always needs a good sounding board to spring from. I’m that board. Springing you all into right action.

Christmas is coming. What are you gonna give Mama that you can’t buy🥠? Hmmm? If it’s me? Ding ding ding!! Winner winner chime. Dinner!! Bout time! Then step back and be blessed. When I unwrap her for all of you!! Now. Let me show you what’s really under that hood. Yep. It’s a xxx Hemi. Ready to ride. Peeling rubber on the green light and winning the damn cup of love she earned.

From who? Me. Hell you can’t see? Me. Her champion. Raised by her best friend Mama Jean. Yeah. That’s folks. Is loves true intent. That’s unconditional love from a damn stranger!! Sent back to the woman who made a strangers dreams come true. Like guess? Liz? I hope you are taking notes.

Cuz this is not how it is for you’d darling. I could leave you there either dear sister of mine that I am being so hard in. Chipping away barnacle of thoughts from days gone by. For healing sake. As Mama heals? We all heal.thats how it works.

She’s the root system we come from.

If Mama ain’t happy? Ain’t no body happy.

I did the work. The math. The relationship work all the counselors couldn’t help me do. With my own Mama.

Update. Messages. Love. Love. Love.

Mamas updates now. Watch out. She’s got her power back. She gave it away to a woman in 1963. And I brought it back with a message fro that woman. Thank you dear sister. I could find words to say how your child has blessed me. But here. Get to know her and see the surprises I’ve planted. As she blooms for you to see how much I love you within her. See me loving you back like no one else could. So I taught her unconditional love to give back to you like you gave it to me. Thank you dear friend for making my dreams come true. I owed you this and never forgot what you did for me. Please accept your gift back with open arms. I’ve filled her with love. More than she had. I watered it with my love which made hers grow stronger for us both for the trying. To make her life better. She’s was always from you. I just played the role. And love it still. I just want to know such a woman who could feel like a mess and not see how amazing she is. For I’ve seen it in her the whole time. I bless you. Please accept this gift. From your other Mother in crime.

In a world that could make you feel like you did. And yet blessed me instead with a chance that was taken so I could get to know you and you to know me. Now our circles complete. This child also show you how much I love you. Xoxo. I did the best that I could not to take her love from you. And now sent it back with interest we both can live on. Xoxo.

Mama. She really does down deep feel this way. Her actions speak loudly. The same commitment you see in me not giving up with us is that same commitment she gave me by not giving up on me. Be blessed. Take what’s being given. Forget what everyone says but your heart. God’s sending blessing through me and my heart to you both. We are all connected. Receive this love. You earned it.

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psychecafe

I am an Adapted, artist, Mother, a soul, a human, singer, writer, activist, minister and deprogrammer and reprogrammer of minds. And I am here because we need to change how you see it, a lot of things that is. For us Adoptees who have lived in the dark. We were cut off from our families. And that is sad people.

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