How, in this fast paced world do we keep up with each other and stay relevant? Its hard. I write here to show you how it with me and all my mess of a family. I haven’t even really pursued my Fathers side, that is how big of a catch up it is for Adoptees to connect and form relationships after reunion. It matters to me to have good relationships with people and this shit with my Mama’s side is upsetting when we are so way off? I mean we should be further, and whatever all this energy is has got to go!
My family blocked me when I began to speak my truth. And that is just not healthy. That I felt forced to speak publicly about this and let the world roam around in our family dealing is a sign as to how much it was affecting me. Not to mention the family of the man I am married to. Talk about overload of energies that are so blocked. And so I was blocked too, until I just opened up and let all my shit out. I mean everyones got shit, most people hide it. Most people deny it. Most people brush it under the rug and act like nothing happened and it builds up, when left undealt with on an emotional level. Emotions must be released and not penned up. It only causes issue.
I had carried all my shit so long? I was used to the weight of it and then I got around some people worse than me and it was enough to make me have to purge. I was like I was a lint roller picking up other peoples shit too. Shit attracts shit. Like attracts like. So to change I had to get rid of the shit in my life. I don’t want to go back to thinking like I have or feeling like I did. That is the beauty of truth. Once it is released and accepted as a teacher, it goes away and bothers you no more. Only if you carried it with another does it come back to help you to help the one you shared it with to let go too.
My family and I had so much updating it was daunting. I mean this is important. Family’s need to stay up to date or this is wha you get? Folks blocking folks and not understanding them because they too are out of date and updates need to happen in person and in letters and cards. I know I make sense, but when people stop working together, this is what you get. I am the only one talking about it out loud here, in print. i want change. The change already happened! Hello? Mama? Are you going to own me? Or what? Hide?
So, I keep in touch with my family here. Until I see the change that needs to manifest into reality. I hold to the dream of it already happened.
Thanks, I hope something here helped you.