Let me say this.

Dirty laundry should never be stuffed into a closet in your mind and left for dead. Dirty laundry does not get up and walk to the washer. And dirty laundry should be washed and then dried and folded. And then placed back where you got it.

You should never wear dirty laundry. And I feel like Mamas been wearing dirty laundry. And my sister have not even told her. Or helped her with it. Now I know. Mama washed yours? And now you can’t even help her with this? Seriously. Girls. You have dirty laundry too. Your actions or lack of. Victoria shows up. A+. She seems to want to do the laundry. But she’s only one in this foursome. K.

You two best believe, Mamas in me now too. If I’m in her? Well she’s in me. And she got a lot to say. But she tired. And needs her black sheep to do some heavy spiritual warfare for her to have her dream reunion. Ego has no place here. The flesh like comfort and God calls us higher in our walk, now. God is calling us to practice loving each other.

We are not enemies. Our thoughts may war. But we are family. I am what Mama looks like when raised by another. I am Uninhibited by the old ways. And so I can say what needs saying. So we can move forward. Together. There is no stopping Mama in me. She’s a goat in me. And I climb high. You all are grounded in a past that was a lie. You have another sister. And she gives a shit. Will you?

Will you lay down your flesh for her? Will you quiet your tongue and speak goodness for her sake? Will you even try to get what this is all about? For Mama wants you too. She wants use together and for our family to be strong and loving. Loving each other is not easy. That’s true. We don’t have to like this that I do. I certainly don’t. But I saw no other way than to just go at it, like a boss.

Mama worked to hard to just lay down and die like this. And you all have got to see that. It’s so important for her legacy. You have a part in this real life drama. I can see how your playing it out. But is it getting you truly what you want?

Mama doesn’t need your pity. Not your shit talk. Do you love her? Really? And do you want her highest good? Ok. Then how in the hell do you think she feels when one girls trying and two stand with there backs to her about it? Look at your own actions. I know mine. And me coming out about it all has a purpose beyond busting your balls.

I am no slacker. I am a servant. Mama gave me away. Yes. And I have done what Mama wanted and served another. I call her Mom too. But never, does a child just go away. Liz. I know I am talking to you. Since the first day I made contact, it was you that got the call. And I believe it was for a reason that I connected to you first. It was key you heard my words first. And my words scared you. Because I spoke about feeling like I had been at the sitter my whole life and I just want to come home.

I know I hit your heart then. And I did not know why? Then. But as time has gone by and I’ve seen Mama struggle with my return, Ive thought of you and your child. Don’t. Tell me I can’t talk about it. Because someone got to help you even if you think like Mama that you’ve got it handled. You don’t. And this life of your needs to count. And a child is a gift. Even if you gave them away. Your son will return when your ready or not. You choose. Pants down? Like Mama? Or prepared by god’s grace with my loving help for your success?

Look at it sisters. Look at your actions about me? Let those actions now wash over you and feel what Mama feels as she looks in dismay. Please lay your egos down and listen to this sister. Mama needs us now. All of us. Just not you. I am her prodigal child come home. Read the story.

There come a time in life when we must grow up and use the tool our Mama taught us for them. And she need us now more than ever. All of us. Not just you three bitches. (Slang) she needs us all to gather around her with love and for her highest good. Will we lead her now? Will we show her now? Who she truly is to us by coming together? Or will we act like catty girls void of training?

Silence can tell a lot about someone. Liz and Phylis are silent. Don’t think this storm will blow over and not lick your wounds as well. If Mama hurts we all hurt. If Mama falls we all fall. This is not the time for placidity or withdrawal. This is a time for action.

It’s true. Mama holds on to shit. Let us her daughter help her let this all go. She’s begging us for it. A good does if tough love and tender care. My ways are every radical. Mamas radical. She did this thing in the 60’s that changes it all for us. And we must rise to her aid now. She’s not telling us. For it is a test. She doesn’t maybe realize it? But god’s testing us all though this that I do.

They say when you squeeze a lemon you get lemon juice for lemonade. It’s sour at first. But with sugar it become the best drink. They also say that when you squeeze a Christian you should get Christ. What shall we exude? Have we not learned a thing about Christ from her? I have. That’s why I’m home. Christ loved even his enemies. Christ loved those who killed him. And I love you. Do you love the part of Mama that’s in me? Hmmm?

Life is crazy. And ours is really just beginning now with each other. Because you now know how deep I go. And yet you run from our Mama in me? She wants us to come together. I just know it. But she wants us to do what’s right for the right reason. As a good Mama would. She wants us to see her heart through all this that she did.

If you all had embraced me at the beginning, we would not be like this. For I send letters and gifts. And yet, you were guarded and stingy with Mama. And guarded with your love? Conditional love is not from God. God’s love is forever and eternal and never gives up. What’s have you dont lately to encourage Mama about me? Hmmm?

I have not seen much movement from Mama. And that show me that Your all just stuck in the muck and the mire my light has shown. Shall you just stay there? I think not. Not on my watch. Your right. I am a bitch, when a butch is needed to get the job done. This job is far from done. And a party is just the thing to make Mama feel better about all she’s done for us her seeds. Shall we bloom? So Mama can see the fruits of her labor? Or shall we lay dormant only to bloom after her passing or not at all?

We have a part in this life drama. We can rewrite our lines. We can choose differently. I am not backing down. Because I am my Mama child. Mama doesn’t back down. You know that. And yet you struggle as well to see the beauty of that in me. Faint not in your well doing sisters. For in our due season we reap. This is our season. My buds are forming and I’m excited as hell. Will you bloom with me? So our fragrance can waft towards Mama and make her heart sing again.

It’s a long road back to Mama. And time has allowed weeds to grow and no one to tend them. I’m on the road outside the door working on the weeds so the beautiful flowers can be seen. Will you come and help me? Will you love this part of Mama at long last? Forgiveness is mandatory in god’s children. Will you lay down whatever is keeping you from helping me to reach her door? Because I can do it myself. And I will reap all the glory. And you.

Will then be left out in the cold like me. I don’t want that for you three. Neither does Mama. But actions is needed. Are you to busy for Mama now? To in your own life to care? Can you lay it on the line, for her now? Or are you all dried up and unable to practice what Mama taught you? Can you not love her anyway? Can you not see what I see? Climb up here. And look. I won’t let us fall again.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s