The truth about many Adoptees is that we don’t adjust properly, because we not afforded services to make sure that we did. This, is a huge whole in the system that has advertised to make peoples dreams come true, and who has not even insured that each and every child adjusts to their new environment. Many Adoptees are told fairytales and live them only to find out that it was a lie, we feel denied the common decency of consideration for what we, as humans have lost. Grief must be validated to be accepted. We must accept that we grieve to adjust to a loss so huge it has left many of us reeling and this loss is experienced at such a crucial time in our lives, that we struggle to live without even having the people that say they love us to support our loss to save their overlay dreams on us. We are not puppets. We are humans, with DNA that links us to each other. WE who are Adopted are linked to those who’s DNA does not match ours. And our struggle can be removed when the world realizes what they do to us, those who’ve grown up as invisible slaves for the sake of morality. Tied to a stake, like dogs who want to go home.
Do not leave us to rott. Adoptees need closure to their full circle and their Mama’s do too. Its 2018 and Mama are hiding from their children for fear? Fear that the mirror of their child will reflect the truths they know within, from experience they have seen what the world thought about them when they did not tell a soul. As a Queen cloaked, they heard the truth beyond their own. And our Mama’s should not fear, the experiment failed. It wasn’t our Mama’s fault, but we all can learn from it and do better. The fault would be if we did nothing.
Dear Adoption, Your Response to Us is Bizarre Adoption comes up often in my daily discussions with family, friends, co-workers and even strangers. I don’t mind stating “I’m adopted”. I do mind the response I receive more often than not. Following my obligatory expressions of gratitude, I sometimes touch on the loss I’ve experienced, […]
Having a voice. Being heard. Be careful what you speak but also speak the truth for you owe it to your readers, to your listeners, to your self. Controversial topics shouldn’t be avoided but rather exploited to give your truth and attract in response the people who REALLY respect you and your values. Being a […]
I look beyond my families learning and see God’s guidance in all.
Good words to live by. When you know God’s words you can decode any book to find answers.
How, in this fast paced world do we keep up with each other and stay relevant? Its hard. I write here to show you how it with me and all my mess of a family. I haven’t even really pursued my Fathers side, that is how big of a catch up it is for Adoptees to connect and form relationships after reunion. It matters to me to have good relationships with people and this shit with my Mama’s side is upsetting when we are so way off? I mean we should be further, and whatever all this energy is has got to go!
My family blocked me when I began to speak my truth. And that is just not healthy. That I felt forced to speak publicly about this and let the world roam around in our family dealing is a sign as to how much it was affecting me. Not to mention the family of the man I am married to. Talk about overload of energies that are so blocked. And so I was blocked too, until I just opened up and let all my shit out. I mean everyones got shit, most people hide it. Most people deny it. Most people brush it under the rug and act like nothing happened and it builds up, when left undealt with on an emotional level. Emotions must be released and not penned up. It only causes issue.
I had carried all my shit so long? I was used to the weight of it and then I got around some people worse than me and it was enough to make me have to purge. I was like I was a lint roller picking up other peoples shit too. Shit attracts shit. Like attracts like. So to change I had to get rid of the shit in my life. I don’t want to go back to thinking like I have or feeling like I did. That is the beauty of truth. Once it is released and accepted as a teacher, it goes away and bothers you no more. Only if you carried it with another does it come back to help you to help the one you shared it with to let go too.
My family and I had so much updating it was daunting. I mean this is important. Family’s need to stay up to date or this is wha you get? Folks blocking folks and not understanding them because they too are out of date and updates need to happen in person and in letters and cards. I know I make sense, but when people stop working together, this is what you get. I am the only one talking about it out loud here, in print. i want change. The change already happened! Hello? Mama? Are you going to own me? Or what? Hide?
So, I keep in touch with my family here. Until I see the change that needs to manifest into reality. I hold to the dream of it already happened.
Thanks, I hope something here helped you.
Vacations over girl. Come home to yourself already! You’re great! I love all of you! Even your back side! I am right here waiting impatiently as usual! LOL.. I love you true sweetie. This is my heart. I don’t care about all that stuff we got, I’ll take all of you, warts and eyelashes. That is the point. I am solid so you can fly! I an the rock that holds you down, keeps you grounded. All is love sweet cheeks. Look for it, and let the lies go, let them out. Speak the lie and it not longer has a hold on you. Like me. I told all, I am real. Solid.
I love and miss you. You, not what you do, just you. No strings except love for you always in my heart and mind. Dont be tripping girl. We are so dope. We are solid. We are family. That is how this Adoptee Mama feels about her kid. Good, bad, you are part of me. And I approve of myself, and I approve of you in all you glory and splendor. I am so happy for my surprise child, now a woman. I respect you. I may not understand, but I respect you. And that is a high gift you have earned from me. Love is a given for a Mama. But respect is earned.
I would respect you more if you called me. LOL Yeah, I am honest. I miss you like hell and was so upset I did not get to see you on your birthday. I hope me coming made you feel special, don’t bother about my family and what they think about it or me. I got that shit on lock. And I am not going anyway, but up from here.
Call me girl, you know my number. Push that button. Blow me up and lets catch up. I am so excited to hear your stories. You always have goods ones. Anyway. Hope you Sunday was restful and filled with love. I pray Gods blessing for this coming week to chase you down the street! Amen