Learning a new dance is hard work. But worth it. In the end.

As I purge the truth and rid myself and my family of the demons associated with Adoption through rigorous education, a clear spot emerges within the rubble. Kind of like when people clean up after a hurricane or tornado. The demons are gone. And only rubble remains, mingled with memories and mementos that mark the spot where something happened, that brought change.

Change happened about 55 years ago. Well. Exactly 55 years ago for me and my clans. Change happened the day I moved away fro

My family through adoption. And change has now come home to show the results and to sift through the rubble and find those treasures that lay hurried beneath the past we shared. A past of separation and grief. To say my Mama does not grieve is silly. Of course she grieves. But will she stay chained to grief and what if and if only. Will she stay on a ship that’s sinking and cling to her past mast? Or will she jump from her old ways? And land on a very strong ship? Will she board this Noah’s ark with me? And will she bring with her my kin? And will we share this new that god has shown me? For us all?

The promised land is a step away. And the first step is in the mind. Looking for it? Watching the waves. Looking for what we see within, without. I have weather the rocky seas of change. To bring the olive branch to Mama, from Mama Jean. I am the dove. Land has been found and the storm is over.

When we trust God and follow his lead, even if it’s your own Mama that thinks your crazy, you obey. For you see what disobedience looks like. Separation. I cling to God as I extend my branch to her in this written testimony of mine. And she can pick all day to find hate if she wants to. But love is my motive. Love pulled me

Home.

Her love pulled me home.

Put that into your little book.

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