Just because you can dance does not mean all can dance with you. Each person does dance to there own beat. And you have to really get to know a person to know the beat they dance to, so, you can join them. Being adopted is like dancing. Adoptees come from families that dance to their own beat, the beat we are born from.
And it takes time for us all to be able to move in the beat that we each have and learn each other’s beat and join as a throng and throb of movement. Adoptees come in as fools filled with a beat that throbs like a haunting call. I think it’s the hero’s journey. As we stumble from not learning the beat of our new families, we bang and bump into the others genetic beat and we grow and learn about other people. I feel that we fail when we cut of ltd the beat that showed up and abandon them as we were and dance on without them and there beat that was our salvation at one time and our provision to live. We fail if we don’t recognize this humanity.
Our adoptive families have lost as well. And they dared to love another’s child as their own, pet adoption rules. And many find that they loose again when we are grown. That is the shame on Adoptees. It is a shame we need to clear up aka do better by those who were not prepared for us and did not know what they really did when they chose to play with our lives without fill knowledge of what really they have done
Adoption is one sided and not on our side. It’s like a blindsided goblin and leads us all array if we don’t realize the child takes the big hit. The parents that adopt in ignorance of this very fact, stumble along in the adorned left from relinquishment wake. And it makes it hard on us. The ones they came to love and care for.
And we learn their dance. Love would lead us to teach them ours. It goes a lot Smoother if we all know each other’s dance.