I am your sister in this that we call adopted.
We were not related before this. But because we have been separated from our clan, we are. Ow connected.
If you could find the words to describe what Adoption has meant to you, what would you say?
We've been through a lot. Many have been through more than me. Many of you have. Wen hurt and rejected more by Adoption.
How can we make this world a safer place for
Children coming to be born? Did you like being moved? Do you like wondering where you came from, why they left you with strangers, and living without your Mama?
My Mama Jean did her best. Yes. And I see that. But she was not the one I came from. And their is way more to my story that has been left out by an irresponsible world that told my Mama I would not remember a thing about her. Ha ha, Adoption, you were wrong. It's in my DNA.
I call pregnancy our meet and greet. We get to know the world around us and our Mama's and family through the veil of her body. Adopted children get to know the world one way, and then have to switch gears after birth and relinquishment. It's hard navigating such Terran without even a manual.
And I ended up with sooooo many questions. Questions my adopted family could not answer for me because they came after the meet and greet. Adoptions tells folks we don't remember. Adoption says we are mindless blobs. And I am saying, I was not a mindless blob inside my Mama growing. I am a human, with a brain and feelings.
I grew up feeling depressed because my story was ripped apart. And their were many, many things that did not line up, like I remembered in the meet and greet stage with my host Mama.
Are Adoptees so worthless that the world can't see we have needs that have not been satisfied by a stranger? Or someone that is outside our family unit?
If adoption is so great? Then why don't we just adopt all children out? So we make this birth and family a level playing field? Some kids get to stay with their families? And some don't? And those that do get to stay? Don't understand those who don't get to stay?
And folks say stupid things that don't make sense to Adoptees. Like the one below.
Ok. This saying makes no sense to the adopted. Ok? We do love our Mama's. We just never got to show her before she gave us away. And we still love our Mama's, but society gave us another Mama. Ok? So this is not a completely accurate saying for us. Or is it?
We were give another Mother by our Mothers who obviously did not feel up to speed with being our Mama's. So. Either we get another Mama and forget the first one? Or we lie to make folks feel ok to say such statement like these.
That is way more accurate for me. And is what I have chosen to do, even though my Mama has cut me off. I still love her as best I can considering all I've been through without her.
I love my Mama's. I don't always understand them? They've lived a wild life, with adoption. They don't act like Mama's that keep their kids. I've been watching folks that keep their kids for years. Not the same.
There are a lot of dead end for Adoptees. And that's what has got me upset. My own Mama is a dead end. She was told so much shit that does not match what is. The things she was told make me invisible to her and has made me appear to be crazy to she and my family.
Adoptee. What was your experience? How do you cope without your Mama? Have you forgotten her? Or do you remember? What would you do different at all if you could? Or are you happy being adopted?
I've played all the mind games trying to find a
Comfortable idea about myself to
Hold onto. But for me, it's like butter is all over everything. And the one thing that is real for me is that I have two Mama's, thanks to adoption. But I only have access to one. And that sucks. Big time.
What is good about a life that has so many restrictions on it? What is so good about a solution that causes so much problems for me? What, can we do about that? Cuz as I see it. Adoptees are the only ones with those answers. But we have to speak up. We have to be brave and show the world the scares that Adoption has left on our minds, bodies, and spirits.
Adoptee. I see you. But I can't hear you. That's why I risked all I have for YOUR FUTURE. because mine is set. I am 54 now. My Mama's are stuck in a mindset. Without your help. They will stay that way. I want you to have your heritage and family. But we must educate them about Adoptions sting upon us.
Can anyone see? If we don't show them Where they missed the mark Adoption professes that doing this would hit? What does it help to allow woman to tap out? Without showing them what you get when you do?
Thanks for stopping by. I know. It's not easy reading this. But change must come for our species to evolve and be better. My report is just as valid as a good adoption report. But what report is good if we hide all the rough stuff? A full report is needed for folks to see the full
Adoptees have the rest of the story that our parents lack. Our parents have the rest of our story that we lack. Surely. We can rise above all this hiding, moving, removing, relinquishing, blocking, separation, dead ends? Surely. In 2017. It is finally safe for our Mama's to speak about their struggles and short comings to us. Their children? With a powerful God. All things are possible to those who dare to believe.