Adoptee’s- Why Selma?

I think we need to plan a Selma walk. In Selma, why? Cuz, we are now at this very minute in many states, The Silenced Slaves. I feel Martin L. Kings words hot on my lips. Because they will ignore us until they must deal with us. And a march makes all have to look. We have been in the arena. Come on. WE have dealt with it all. And so we are strong. Come out of the closet. Speak your truth. And right this thing once and for all. July 2, 2016 Selma March “The Silenced Slaves”, A peaceful demonstration of the power of our numbers. Awareness will bring change children of the darkness. We need not be someone shame baby any longer and there should never have been any. Right it for future generations. We throw ourselves away. Open the records and let people have what is theirs rightfully, civil. It is the right thing to do.

We are many, lets show them how many. WE can do this! WE were separated from our families, yes. Don’t stay separated from life because of it. Change this world while your are here. Your voice is priceless.

Adoptions time is over. Time for the Real Dogs to come and show you how not to do it! Unite Now!

Hey, I love calling peps out. It seems I came to be pushy. Can I help you push a button or two? Let me know. This whole thing is bullshit and needs to stop right now. And we need to unit to stop it. WE have suffered for the sins of our fathers and mothers for long enough and enough is enough! The world needs to change and we are the ones who need to let them know.

I need stories, feelings, people who want to make this happen in the Big way we deserve to serve it to them.

Send me your stories and I’ll post them here, or post them here, whatever peels your banana. But get them here! I want all to see our numbers.

UNITE

What do I want?

My family, my whole family to get their heads out of their asses.

I want my sister to tell her kids she’s is a Birth Mother.

I want my sister to educate herself about the most important thing she ever did, which was relinquish her child.

I want my family to accept me for who I am, not who they want me to be for them.

I want to be able to go visit them without having to worry about being quiet about the fact that my sister has not told her children about what she did, even though she was shown already how it goes if you don’t prepare? She watched me and our Mother struggle.

I want honesty in my family of origin. They are my family too. In Gods law I am still family. In Gods law I belong.

I need to be able to talk about this until I don’t need to talk about this.

I need for my Bio Mother to act like a Mother, and not some God Damn tyrant, telling me to clean up my act? Would if I was gay? I mean come on?

I need a willingness to be honest and open about everything, so we can get to know one another.

I want my sisters to get past our Mothers issues and see that they deny themselves to do this to me. Would if I was you? Phyllis ? Liz?

I want my family to see I am not kidding, this is excruciatingly hard to do. Deal with your lack of knowledge.

I would like us to be able to spend time together, but with all this secrecy, who can?

I want my daughter to call me. It’s been to long, and no one should have left her like that. Thinking I am a monster. Or whatever she’s thinking it’s not about calling her Mom. Oh, she’s leading folks to Christ. Lordy. I mean you treat your Mother like shit and you think your works can reach the ears of God? Come on.

I expect my family to stand up for me. I expect them to see me for who this has made me to be. And to not give up on me.

I don’t understand you, but yet I keep showing up, trying.

You just judge me. Where is Jesus in this?

Did Albert Einstein make sense? But he was brilliant.

6 Steps to Help Heal Your Inner Child | World of Psychology

6 Steps to Help Heal Your Inner Child | World of Psychology.   These are the steps to take back the life you gave away because you felt highjacked by a society that just does not have clue what Adoption does to people. I have now found that Amino acid Therapy is a helpful thing in healing our neurotransmitters from a burn out when we were adopted. Our brains not developed enough to cope with such a trauma as to loose our Mothers. We carry unprocessed grief for years. We struggle explaining it to anyone. We are told to let go, we are told to hold on, we are given meds to cope, we are told we are broken, we are frustrated. Why? Because no one wants to hear our story. People are more enamored with the lie that Adoption is building strong families, and that Adoptee’s are growing up healthy and happy with not problems at all. And if problems arise, it’s the child. There is something wrong with the child. Geez. These myths are just so ridiculous. When will we face our actions? When will we look at each other and face it? Standing up is part of the process. Education of the real truth is imperative. And for the grief to process out is necessary. Mothers thought, back in the day, that that was it. You adopt your kid out and you never see them again. And my Mother of 25! WOW! thought that she was done. She really did. And I came back and she just didn’t get it. She just doesn’t get it. That she thought she was done, but God has another plan. His plan, and his plan includes everyone. And it includes coming clean in all areas. I did not want to find out that my Birth Mother did not plan for me to come back? I did not want to hear that my sister had given a child up for adoption as well. I find it strange that I fell into contact with her first? Some of the things I said to her, must have just chilled her blood. I did not want to think that my Birth Mother would take my kid in and judge me. Or that she would not try to do the right thing by calling me to let me know my kid was ok. I did not want my kids to be hurt. But they were. And what could I have done about it? I didn’t know? Everyone around me told me I was ok. Why didn’t I feel ok? Why was I upset? Why did I cry the whole way home after seeing my Birth Mom for the first time. My baby was in the car when I did. Chelsie. I cried all the way home. I didn’t know why? I was just wrenching. And now I know how deep my grief is. Deep. How do I know? I dug as far as it went. This is so helpful when your coming clean to just speak your truth. People will not all understand. But do it anyway. We must go through it, to get to the other side.

I carried it all around with me like a bag of dirty tricks. 

I carried it all around with me like a bag of dirty tricks.  

All of my pain. All of the trauma. I thought surely my mom could help me make sense of it. But no, she did not. She just took it personally. She just couldn’t see I guess. I was at the end of my rope. No where else to go. 

I’d been all over trying to fix it. I was wounded and hurting. I was confused and anxious. And what I feared the most happened. Rejection again and again. 

No room for me still is how I felt. Still inconvenient. Still not ready for me. 

And my kids suffer because their mommy is hurting and unable to rise above. So trying to be all they needed but unable to perform. Unable to be anything other than what I am. They throw me away as well. 

They did not need to take on my shit. But they did. Because they loved me. I tried to give them what I could. What I had, but it was a ball of puss and blood from a wound so deep i couldn’t even see it. 

I struggled to be all they needed, but failed. And now. I just want to be me. The me I hid for years scared of being rejected. And it’s true. They reject me for being like this. My bio mom pushes me away still, leaving me with a phone in my hand and a long list of requirements to be accepted into the fold. Ugh. Lord help us. 

From my sis. 

You mean there’s MORE? Jesus- how much do we have to endure? I got it!! You felt abandoned! You felt cheated! You blame everyone for this…but won’t get professional help to work through it. GOT IT!!

Anyone else want to respond to this? 

I do not blame anyone. It is what it is. But I can not be who you want me to be. I must be me. I stand at the door with my truth and all you guys can think of is yourselves. And there is no room for me in your lives with all those lies and misinformation. 

When we gonna be ready for Selma?

july 2nd 1964 was 52 years ago. I was at that very time stripped of my original birth certificate. My true records omitted from public record. My life prior to Adoption wiped. It was it? And still adoptees fight for a right we should already have. Nation wide open records. 

If we march in Selma. Like martin Luther King lead the black Americans. You make them face it. And change!! We surely can march to bring awareness? 

Let’s start a conversation about it. Bringing a big move ment making people aware of our side. Our story. Everyone. Even those who’s were good experiences. All matter. 

People really are just unaware. They don’t mean to sound mean. But we have left them in the dark you see? We gotta fess up and speak our truth. Even if our parents and the world don’t want to look at it because it’s not like they thought. If we don’t look at it, how can we change it?